• Backdoor sluts 9

    I would commission the creation of Backdoor Sluts 9 and abstain until the movie was complete and bust my engorged nut to that imaginary masterpiece.

  • My daily commute

    I work a graveyard shift and I live about 40 minutes away from my work by car. So, to stay awake I’ve taken to fapping while driving. Not aggressively and not to the point of diverting my attention to much but just enough to keep my heart rate up and myself from falling asleep. The other day though a cop pulled me over for going 12 miles over the speed limit. But I didn’t realize until he pointed it out that I still had my one hand down my pants! I got off with a warning because I used the same hand to pass him my registration and he didn’t want to grab it from me! #winning!

  • That first time with a fleshlight

    I made a point to abstain from touching myself from the time that I ordered it to the day it arrived. Regular shipping. 2 weeks, 2 days and change of budding testosterone. So when the time came… I lasted all of like a minute and a half before I popped. … Pop! Pop! 

    Now that I've had the toy for over a year its lost some of its lustre 

  • A gross albeit happy accident

    I’m not especially proud of this but I was, all of a sudden and totally wirhout warning, super horny when I was eating dinner in front of my laptop. It was Nachos, finger food so I thought – fuck – what’s the point of having a free hand if you’re not going to use it? And in my privacy discovered that sourcream is a pretty effective, albeit extremely messy lubricant. Credit should probably go towards the cheesy nacho grease too.

  • Eavesdropping

    College dorm walls were super thin and kinda ashamed to admit that many a time I'd get off on my neighbour and his girlfriend going at it

  • Cornstarch is your new best friend

    You can make a pretty amazing sex toy out of cornstarch. What you need is; a large glass, at least 100g of cornstarch, some water, a microwave and a stick that’s not quite as wide as “you” are. Mix the cornstarch with equal parts water to start. Mix thoroughly. Like super thoroughly. When almost fully dissolved at 1 more part of water (so in the end it’s 1 part cornstarch to 2 parts water) and mix thoroughly again until it’s 100% dissolved. Stick that in the microwave for on minute. Take it out and let it cool for a little bit until it sort of solidifies. Then make a small hole with your finger until it’s up to your second knuckle and stick the thing in the microwave again for another 30 seconds. Take it out again, stick the stick in a fair ways (enough depth so that it will be pleasurable leave more than an inch from the bottom of the glass) put the glass in the fridge to cool. ~ 1 hour. After which the toy should slip right out of the glass and be ready to use. ;)

  • Skydiving Fap

    If your parachute doesn't open, you might as well take the opportunity to get in one last fap. The question is: do you point towards the ground and risk giving yourself a facial or do you shoot towards the sky and risk getting a cumshot on your mangled carcass? I supose the beat would be to shoot your load sideways and race it to the ground.
  • Fruit roll-up

    I once wrapped a fruit roll-up around my bf's cock and sucked till it was all gone. He loved it, and it was tasty, albeit sticky

    Technically not fapping but hey I figured you peeps would be happy for the imagery regardless

  • Uncontrollable convulsions good

    I have epilepsy. One night I was going at it in my bed and lo and behold I have a seizure. So naturally my parents hear something and have to come in to me seizing on the bed dick out porn on the computer. Very embarrassing to have to find out from them (since I lose a bit of memory of the event and am unconscious during it). All I can say is it must have been one hell of an orgasm to make me seize (more than the usual jerky cumming movements anyway).

  • Over normal conversation

    I masturbate while chatting with my unknowing GF while holding a regular convo. I keep the camera tilted from waist up and its pretty tough to see me moving my hand or anything as long as I don't get too into it. She has no idea and kinda talks more than me as it is so I just sit there and listen and nod and say mhm a lot while getting off. I think it's so hot to hear her talk and laugh and hear her voice again. (we're both at home from our college for the summer and are in a LDR for 3 months) She doesn't have to be talking about anything sexual and I know she has said she doesn't want to have skype sex. (we've talked about it and both agreed it would be weird) I get off on both her voice, the fact that she doesn't know about it, and the taboo of it all.